The holiday season is here and of course, we have all been bombarded with the images of Santa, Christmas trees, and sales at places like Macys’ and Target. I’ve always been taught that Christmas is a time to spend with family and friends and to give back to others who are less fortunate. That holds true now as an adult, but as a child, I always thought that Christmas was about getting stuf that my mom would have never gotten me throughout the year. Birthdays’ and Christmas was the only time of the year I’ve really gotten anything such as toys and maybe some outfits here or there and given that my birthday is in June, I got to experience the joy of getting every 6 months. And each time, I was grateful that my mom went out of her way with the little bit of money she made to buy my brother and I presents that otherwise, she wouldn’t get throughout the year.
Ok, back on topic.. So as a child, I used to believe in Santa Claus as most kids do. I would pretend that I was good all year, even though when I got in trouble, I wasn’t thinking about how Santa felt about my actions. But right around the holidays, I would do extra chores around the house and finish my homework, and help out my mom a little more because I knew that Santa was gonna get me stuf for being a good girl. What I always wanted was an Easy Bake Oven that bakes cookies and cakes using a light bulb. My aunt had one and her’s looked cool, so I wanted one too. I would write letters to Santa asking him, among other things, that I really really really, wanted an Easy Bake Oven for Christmas and that I was a good girl for a whole year and deserved one. It was the least he could do. I even left out a plate of cookies for him to snack on while he worked. Well one year, maybe I was 11 or 12, I decided that this would be the last time I would ask Santa for an Easy Bake Oven. If he didn’t deliver, then he wasn’t real in the first place and if he did, then my belief would continue. So when I woke up early Christmas morning and found that my Easy Bake Oven wasn’t there, I was very disappointed and felt let down. Santa Claus really wasn’t real and in fact, it was my parents buying and putting presents under the tree at midnight and lying(yes I said it!) to me about Santa. Besides, how could Santa deliver presents to all the little boys and girls around the world in one night? And what old, fat white man would be crazy enough to deliver presents in the neighborhoods I lived in by himself without being robbed or shot at? Thus, cynicism and doubt set in.
I bring this up because it is the Holidays, but it’s just an example of how we have become more cynical and unimaginative. We are always taught that we can be whatever we want to be if you put your mind to it and just believe in it. “Have faith, it will happen!” “If you see it, they will come!” When did we stop believing that the possible was impossible? Hell, we do have a black president now and even 5 years ago, nobody thought that was possible. I believe that as we go through life’s trials and tribulations, we accept what is around us as reality and we accept reality through a tangible prism of what we can see, hear, or touch. When there are drawbacks, we become more disillusioned to the possible and have a cynical mindset. Because there are those that don’t believe in GOD or some other higher being, he/she must not be real because of all the evil that exists in this world. Because we didn’t get what we wanted even though we played by the rules, the plan just wasn’t attainable to begin with. When I never got the Easy Bake, I stopped believing in Santa Claus because even though I did the right thing by being a good girl, I never got what I wanted. That didn’t stop me from learning how to bake cookies and cakes because I did it anyway in a regular oven. I felt a sense of satisfaction when I helped my mom bake cakes and cookies and not having to rely on a light bulb to do it for me. After I got out of the military and wanted to become a govt contractor, it took me a long time to accept the fact that it wasn’t going to happen. My main goal then was sustainable income and doing something I felt would give me satisfaction. Even though, that didn’t happen, I now have that with Green Afro Diva. So just because the possible didn’t happen with the path that you took, doesn’t mean that it will never happen with other paths. The goal of satisfaction was achieved without me giving in to doubt and fear. We become fearful and doubtful about what the future will bring and as a result, we live life as we see it now and not the possibilities of what is in store for the future. I believe that all things are possible through a combination or hard work persistence and the most important belief of faith. The point of this piece isn’t for people to start believing in Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy again, but it is to highlight the fact that it’s ok to imagine and believe in the possible again.
A snippet from The Impossible Dream written by Joe Darrion and composed by Mitch Leigh
This is my quest
To follow that star
No matter how hopeless
No matter how far
To fight for the right
Without question or pause
To be willing to march into Hell
For a heavenly cause